Ninja Chickens - A Force The Force Of Nature

Once upon a time there was a boy called Spaniel who lived on a farm with his Mum and Dad and his little Sister called Lemony-Snickets.

It was Sunday morning; the sun was streaming through the gap in the curtains shining on Spaniel face, gently waking him up.

Spaniel could hear a ‘Boing Boing Boing Boing OUCH’ coming from his sister’s bedroom. Spaniel knocked on the wall shouting at Lemony to be quite as he was still snoozing and that she would wake up hoover the cat.



Lemony shouted ‘I don’t care, I’m Ninja Girl and I’m going to get you’

Spaniel groaned, muttering back to Lemony ‘Oh yea you and whos army?’

At this point his sister stopped bouncing and thought to herself, mmm perhaps your right I need an army, mmmm now I wonder who could I enrol? Perhaps mum? No, perhaps Dad? No, mmmm I wonder.

At that point Spaniel wandered into Lemony’s room grabbed here doll and left saying that he needed something for target practice. Lemony was horrified shouting I’m going to get you!! You Meany, Spaniel ignoring his sisters threats muttering to himself ‘yada yada yada!

‘Breakfast kids’ shouted mum from downstairs, at which point both Lemony and Spaniel ran down the stairs and jumped up onto their chairs at the kitchen table.

‘Well kids, either rice flakes or sausage sandwiches? What would you like?’

‘Sausage sandwiches please’ they both shouted in unison.

Whilst munching away at the breakfast Lemony kept telling Spaniel she was going to ‘muster her army and they were going to get him’, ‘oh yea’ said Spaniel ‘I suppose your going to get the chickens to help you are you’ he continued laughing. Lemony was getting annoyed by Spaniels taunting. ‘you just wait, you wait’ said lemony.

‘Alright where would you like me to wait’ said Spaniel thinking he was clever with such a response.

‘In eh um In the garden’ said Lemony who then stormed off. ‘And bring my doll Alfie with you as well’ she yelled as she went out of the doo to the front garden.

Lemony went and sat under the walnut tree in the garden, she started to ponder what can I do to get my brother back? Mmmm as she was doing this she was talking to herself coming up with various dastardly deeds. She hadn’t realised that someone was listening to her. Well in fact there were four pairs of ears listening to her.

High up in the tree was Cyril the squirrel sat in a hammock watching the world go by whilst munching on a walnut.

Lemony hadn’t noticed him up their, but every now and then there was a ‘plop’, ‘plop’, ‘plop’ Lemony kept looking around what was making that noise but she couldn’t work it out.

As Lemony sat there, Hewi, Lewi and Dewi where sat in their chicken coup listening intently to Lemony. All three chickens then began talking to each other saying what a great little girl Lemony was and that they should try and help her, they all agreed they would. However the real reason they decided to help was the fact that her brother Spaniel was their arch enemy and they had had many battles.

So all three said in unison ‘don’t worry Lemony we will help you’, Lemoney turned round ‘who who’s there?’ asked Lemony in a slightly nervous voice. ‘Don’t worry little girl it’s THE NINJA CHICKENS’ shouted the trio as they sprang out of their coup.

AHHH shouted Lemony in a stake of shock. It wasn’t every day that she saw talking chickens with ninja capes and masks on. ‘Don’t worry Lemony we will help you’ with that the three chickens came over to Lemoney and said leave it to us we will get your brother Spaniel he’s our arch enemy.

At that point there was a loud ‘KAPLUNK’ as Cyril the squirrel fell out of the tree and landed on top of Hewi. Cyril sprang to his feet and looked around apologising to Hewi. ‘OH NO A TALKING SQUIRREL’ said Lemony as she nearly fainted.

‘Talking chickens and a talking squirrel what’s happening in the world? Said Lemony, Its progress said Dewi, I suppose you haven’t spoken to the horse and cow yet then?

‘UUUUUU’ my head hurts said Lemony, ‘now don’t worry’ said Hewi, it’s alright. Let’s now deal with the matter in hand, SPANIEL.

‘What’s he done?’ apart from the obvious, said Cyril, ‘well he’s got my doll and he’s going to use it for target practice’ said Lemony in a crumbly voice.

‘Right troops’ said Cyril turning to his three comrades ‘lets make a plan’. So they all sat down with tea and biscuits making a plan.

After much pondering they came up with one, at that moment Spaniel came whistling into the garden carrying Lemonys doll and his bow and arrow set.

Lemony and her new friend jumped behind a bush and watched Spaniel.

He perched the doll on a bush and paced backwards 10 paces counting as he went.

‘OH NO’ he’s going to shoot Alfie with an arrow squeaked Lemony, ‘oh no he’s not’ said the animals as they all pounced out from behind the bush encircling Spaniel.

Cyril said to Spaniel ‘hand over the doll or we will be forced to NINJALISE you’

Mmmmm thought Spaniel, ‘well if its not my old chums Hewi, Lewi, Dewi and Cyril so you think you four can take me out?’ ‘well think again’ said Spaniel as he spun around holding out his bow, and with a klunk, klunk, klunk and klunk Spaniel splattered his four foes across the garden.

All four ninjas jumped shouting ‘BANZI LETS NINJALIZE HIM’ and they sprang across the garden with a great leap landing on top of Spaniel together and jumping up and down on the spot saying ‘AHH YOU’VE BEEN NINJALIZED’ with a great roar, Spaniel jumped up catapulting all four ninjas across the garden, Hewi flew head first into the dung heap pooh smelly, Lewi flew straight into the pond with a great splash, Dewi went straight into the buses with a loud yell, after all it was a holly bush! And finally Cyril bounced into the tree trunk with such force it rained walnuts on his head.

While Spaniel did this Lemony sneaked across the garden and managed to get hold of her doll before running into the house to tell mum and dad of her adventure and that they had a talking squirrel and chickens.

Spaniel just laid on the grass slightly dazed whilst he watched the ninjas scurry off……